The Silver Linings Ahead

"Oh youth!" My doctor cried. "You recovered much faster than I expected."

I felt validated. Youthful. This disease had hid in my body for years - itching for the best time to strike. And finally, my bout with shingles was about to end. Just in time for my thirtieth birthday.

Thirty is a milestone. But I really don't know, how I want to celebrate my birthday.

Aunty says there is significance to every tenth year of life called wun ching. Once the Chinese Year of the Rat began, I was already officially thirty and apparently, my wun ching had already started.

She just didn't want to scare me.

She said something, something, always happens on those ten-year milestones – you just can't know how bad it is until it hits.

Well then I figured, the worst must be over.

The Olympics is a milestone for China.

The date of the opening ceremonies is auspicious. August 8, 2008 is a Chinese number sentence come true. The number eight means wealth and a set of triple could only bring triple the prosperity. But despite that, the world's perception of China is still...tepid.

I never really felt a strong connection to China.

My family fled from China during the Cultural Revolution by boat, to Hong Kong. My family has every reason to criticize China and so does the world.

Chinese persecution of Tibetan monks and the pollution wafting in from active coal mines into Beijing are deserving of attention. But I can't help but want to pull back, way back, and think about what the Chinese people have endured. The devastation of the Cultural Revolution, from within. Or from the outside, what the Japanese attempted to do and my grandmother's memory of that time.

Even Zhang Yimou, known for his critique of China, spent two years designing the Olympic opening ceremonies. So here I am, surprised at myself, for feeling proud that China is hosting this year's summer Olympics.

It isn't nationalism. It wasn't nationalism that inspired Hong Kong celebrities to continue carrying the Olympic torch as protesters threatened to impede their progress. Maybe its naive to feel this way, but I believe it's unbridled cultural pride. And I'm feeling it too. What a wonderful feeling.

The Olympic games means so much for China. The Chinese Diaspora is cheering and even my grandmother's cheering. And if you know me at all, you'll know that I can't disagree with her.

They aren't cheering despite the fact that China has problems, I think they just need this moment to celebrate their culture. The Chinese will make their mark in history and I'm positive that they'll find solutions to the problems they face. For now, I'm celebrating my heritage too.

There will be a silver lining for China. And a silver lining, for me too. I'm about to be thirty.

I guess I'll figure things out as the days approaching my birthday run out one by one. I've survived my wun ching. I will embrace my culture and my extreme flaws and look ahead. I'll look at the scars left behind by my shingles and think, I recovered, fast.

Youth is still on my side.