Piano Practice

I should be studying but I say that ALL the time. So I'm here. I'm blogging. =)

I enjoy my Friday afternoons after class. There's a child somewhere in my apartment complex practicing piano and it's always nice to listen. I've taken naps to the music she plays and the sound of her teacher tapping away at the piano and counting. I'm so glad I'm doing the listening, and she's doing the playing!

Lately, I've been so consumed by this preparing to become a teacher process that I've forgotten the why. And now that I think about it, I remember - its because I want to work with youth. But I feel like I've been apart from directly working with youth for SO long. Though the program I'm in is all about social justice, I feel oddly disconnected from the community.

I know classmates who are still volunteering with youth programs on their off time. On my off time -I work. I hate quitting jobs but I'm convinced my restaurant can find someone else =) And really, I just wanted to know if I could handle the balance of work and school. I can handle work and school but there has been no time for any sort of life. And life for me must include: family, friends, Fred, and work of any sort with youth and community.

This epiphany of course, is no epiphany at all. I was eavesdropping today. (shhhhhh) And overheard some of my classmates talking about how our social justice program isn't living up to its promises. At least, I think that's what they said OR I heard something I wanted to hear.

And it led naturally to me asking myself, what am I doing that is social justice oriented? Surely, my being in school working towards my teaching credential counts right? But simply because I talk about social justice, think about it, read about it, and listen to people do some more of that on KPFK or at UCLA doesn't mean I've done anything.

So, again, I think I need to quit my job and be doing more meaningful things. And meaningful will mean having time to be with people I love and making time to volunteer and put into action the things that I'm learning. I have to figure out what that will look like for me, but I think I'll be going back to my old after school program and helping where they need the help. We'll see. I'll keep you updated ; )